The Royal Marines Band Service On-line Community

Albert the Aardvark · Posted: Wed Dec 07, 2005 1:48 pm Post subject: Hi from a Serving Aardvark

Hello Uncle Aaron and everyone else.

I've been in the RM Band Service (curently on secondmant to the Blue Band Office until I have my audition) for almost a week now I think, I don't care because I having a whale of a time and time is nothing here!
Over the weekend I was on sentry duty in the stock room looking after all the CDs so I supopose you can say I was the Guardvark!
When they came back from their weekend they found what a clever Aardvark I am as I had made myself a bed and concealed myself should anyone try and get in to steal the music

I wrapped myself up in a tea towel, some bubble wrap (wonderful for heat insulation) and an old CD box. I slept with one eye open as you can see from above. I'm not sure what I'm doing this weekend yet or where I'm going for leave but when the Blue Band Office is closed they leave all of the computers on so I can have a quick look around the web

Next time someone puts their credit card details in I'll be making notes

I quite fancy a visit to that Ant Hill at Marwell Zoo, Pusser can pay!

I must run now, they are back from lunch shortly and I'm supposed to be doing a stocktake.

Bye for now
Grunt, scratch, sniff sniff

Aaron Aardvark · Posted: Wed Dec 07, 2005 8:13 pm Post subject:

Well! Hello Albert. I'm glad you have found a grot....you look very cosy. Don't forget though if you get chilly, that admin guy, Deli, wouldn't mind you popping into bed with him. I hear he likes a good back scratch by an ungulate.

Now then....have you decided which instrument you want to take up. May I suggest you DONT choose piccolo.....I knew someone once who did a naughty thing with a piccolo and every time he farted afterwards he played a rather good rendition of 'Stars and Stripes Forever'. Bit of a giveaway really.

Anyway, be a good boy and stay out of girlie grots.

Uncle Aaron

Albert the Aardvark · Posted: Thu Dec 15, 2005 10:24 pm Post subject:

Hello all, I have escaped!

I have been stag on in the stock room and promoted to GuardVark

NOne shall pass on my watch I can tell you. So that is what I have been doing most of the time.

Admin nipped off yesterday to 'Update the website' if you know what I mean, nudge nudge wink wink so as the secretary was off galavanting around buying all the nibbles for the xmas party I had a quick surf. Admin left the webcam out

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Albert the Aardvark
VD SCAR&Bar RM

Albert the Aardvark · Posted: Thu Dec 15, 2005 10:28 pm Post subject:

As I've mentioned the secretary I'll let you know what happened at the party.
Well, she went off buying all sorts of bits (NO ANTS!) so I thought I'd have a quick snack. You know how it is don't you?
One led to another and another and another and before I knew it they'd all gone

After the mince pies, I started on the sherry, my head is throbbing still!
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Albert the Aardvark
VD SCAR&Bar RM

Albert the Aardvark · Posted: Thu Dec 15, 2005 10:31 pm Post subject:

Oh and then the secretary came back and caught me with Mince pie crumbs around my snout and had the cheek to blame me! Me! I don't even like them!
Well, we had a chat and I explained to her about my wishes to see the world.

Do you know what they wanted to charge us in postage? Quids! Quids is what they wanted to charge us, gotta go, that admin is on his way back

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Albert the Aardvark
VD SCAR&Bar RM

admin · Posted: Thu Dec 15, 2005 10:39 pm Post subject:

Bl00dy Ardvark!
I got back and what was he doing? Crappers on my desk that's what!

Next thing the phone rang and it was a bit of totty for him. Some bird called Sac (sounded like a right little goer!). She said she knew Aaron and it had all been sorted out "What?" said I
Pharp went Albert...

Next thing I know he's off saying something about NATO travel order, Sprouts and Phlegm. He was minging I tell you. At least he had the decency to get his leave pass.

Albert was last seen sticking a couple of fingers up and saying he ahd to be somewhere!
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RAB · Posted: Fri Dec 16, 2005 12:07 am Post subject:

Dear..Oh Dear..Oh Dear..The Youngsters Nowadays

They come in when they like..Go out when they like..Scoff all your rations
..Steal your "wold" and disappear out the back door without so much as a "sorry for sh****ng on your 'puter"...

MAKE BLOODY GOOD BUGLERS

aardvark seeker · Posted: Sat Dec 17, 2005 5:43 am Post subject: the seeker

im coming to get you, be scared be very scared

FFoglamp · Posted: Sat Dec 17, 2005 10:40 am Post subject:

leave little Albert alone...............you bully with your insignificant threats !!!

Go for Aaron, the big daddy.

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Mmmmmmm PIE!!! How rare.

bootybandy · Posted: Sat Dec 17, 2005 1:10 pm Post subject:

I'm really impressed to see that Snr. Aardvark has impeccable taste in IT. Apple Mac of course.....Booty :O)

RAB · Posted: Sat Dec 17, 2005 4:47 pm Post subject:

OH AARDVARK SEEKER YOU'VE DONE IT NOW

You take on one Aardvark you take on the lot..Threatening one of their
kids(or is it pups) is quite unforgivable..Do not leave your city boundaries
and tread very carefully around anthills..They WILL be watching you..
Remember..Aardvarks have the biggest "hooters" in the Band Service..Painful..very very painful..

Aaron Aardvark · Posted: Sun Dec 18, 2005 9:26 pm Post subject: Re: the seeker

jock · Posted: Mon Dec 19, 2005 2:15 am Post subject:

with a nose like that even loony must be scared, if it counts the hunter is barred from sunny newtonmore,any clues to the hunters id will be welcome

Aaron Aardvark · Posted: Mon Dec 19, 2005 10:53 am Post subject:

Thanks Jock, Rab and Ffoglamp.........come on you aardvarks yehhhh

I have at least three friends.......oh and that admin bloke is ok too.

aardvark seeker · Posted: Mon Dec 19, 2005 5:14 pm Post subject:

the seeker can come and go with out anybody seeing him, even in newtonmore. where ever that is